The Tragic Optimist

aches

Sorry for the recent blog silence. I was at a conference in Massachusetts the end of last week, and then recovering from the conference. It was actually a good trip, but one of those deals where I kept forgetting that it was coming up, at it kind of caught me by surprise. In any case, it all worked out fine, and I had a lovely time except for losing my voice. It’s mostly back, but I still have a definite sultry timbre to my voice, which I would keep, if that were possible.

Before I left for the conference, Zoe had still been nursing once a day in the mornings.  Since being back, she hasn’t asked to nurse at all.  Tomorrow morning will be a full week since our last nursing session, so I guess that means she’s weaned.  It’s a bittersweet milestone.  My breasts still ache a bit, and my heart aches a bit, too.  And honestly, I miss the excuse to curl up with Zoe for the early morning nursing before having to face the world.  But I know, rationally, that she’s growing up, and I had been working towards weaning her, so I’m pleased that it went as easily as it did.  And in some ways, it’s nice to know that we still have a good relationship without the nursing. There were times when I questioned how much Zoe really liked me, and how much she just really liked the easy access to my milk.  But it turns out that she’s still just as happy to see me in the mornings, even if the morning wake up doesn’t come with a drink anymore.

I have a bunch of other posts that I’m working on, but I feel like I’ve hit a patch of writers’ block or something.

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5 Comments

  1. Oh, Ann! This post is a wonderful description of all that you feel when your child doesn’t need to nurse anymore. It made me laugh that you questioned how much she liked you. Isn’t it crazy that we have that insecurity?

  2. Thanks, it makes me feel better to hear that others sometimes feel insecure.

  3. Ahh I can imagine that that would be hard for you. I am glad it went so smoothly! Sorry about your sore throat too! bummer.

  4. It sounds like one of those things where you are happy it went well, but then almost sad because it went too well.

    It sounds like you have a wonderfully well adjusted daughter!

  5. I was sad, too, when my son stopped nursing. Same thing, I came back after being away (for a week!) and he just forgot I had breasts or something. The only good thing was he wasn’t waking me up at night anymore for “booby.”

    I’m still nursing 16-month-old daughter and it hadn’t even occured to me until I read this that she too is going to stop nursing someday. That will make me even sadder cuz I know she is the last baby I’ll have.

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